Its all bit fucked but I keep smiling

Well things have gone a bit fucked with ____ I was kind of in a casual relationship/ just friends thing. Im exhausted but most of all im angry with myself that I was so easily led.  But I have learned a life lesson dont listen to what people say but watch  their actions and never do anything to try a save a relationship.HE encouraged me to register a domain name and  made promises to help me set up a business website and host. He also promised to teach me inline skating as he is qualified instructor. He encouraged me to buy skates costing more than £80 and I did. I bought the skates so that he could teach me and we would have something in common. _____ stood me up last week with an reasonable excuse. However he also sent an email trying to cancel meeting up after we were suppose to be meeting  up, school boy error.
But I could just tell it was over there was no real apology and nothing said about arranging another time. So I responded get in touch when you sort your problems out, good luck . I have deleted his number and email.   I have felt a little sad since,but I will get over. Im not expecting a reappearance but with men you never can tell.

Im still going to learn how to inline skate so it wont be a completly loss cause, Im still going to set up my business too. But now I will have to sort it out myself which is probably for the best.

In other the news the Ex who cant stop lying is back on the scene, he texts me constanly pretending to care but all really wants to do is get laid and then fuck off again . He admits he lied about getting married and girlfriend who is expecting and moving to Canada.Despite the fact I know he nearly destroyed me Im considering seeing him again. I must be a sadist, Im likely to get hurt again if I get involved with him.In fact if I get back with him I am a complete idiot.

My friend says I pick the wrong men and I think she is right. She also states she thinks  I suffer  from low self esteem and this is why I keep settling for less. I dont think she is right about that. I settle for less as Im trying to make things less complicated and I want my freedom. I like sex but I dont always want to be serious relationship to have it. I dont always want to be dealing with the ups and downs of another person. Im selfish . But I think Im not very good at reading when  people are genuine and I make mistakes. Im tired of making mistakes with men. I think I need a long break.